“Behind every successful man, there is a surprised woman.”
Maryon Pearson”

“Why can’t women tell jokes? Because we marry them! “
Kathy Lette

“Guys are like dogs. They keep coming back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time…they’re gone.”
Lenny Bruce”

“Men are generally more law-abiding than women. Women have the feeling that since they didn’t make the rules, the rules have nothing to do with them.”
Diane Johnson

“Women are never disarmed by compliments. Men always are. That is the difference between the sexes.”
Oscar Wild”

“To become a perfect woman, it would be only smart to understand men better. You might try, and try and try and…then graciously give up. Always with flair, always making it look natural.”

Is It Possible To Understand Men?
Well, I do like men.  The world is surely better with them around. After all, what fun they are! 🙂
But here is a little discovery about their inner feelings and thinking, so it might come in handy to women who often losing it and becoming hopeless in understanding them. Please don’t try too hard. Be smarter, let them try to figure us out, while we have fun to watch… This could be a beauty on its own… So enjoy!

Because I’m A Man

Because I’m a man, I must hold the television remote control in my hand while I watch TV. If the thing has been misplaced, I may miss a whole show looking for it. Though one time I was able to survive by holding a calculator.

Because I’m a man, when the car isn’t running very well, I will pop the hood and stare at the engine as if I know what I’m looking at. If another man shows up, one of us will say to the other, “I used to be able to fix these things, but now with all these computers and everything, I wouldn’t know where to start.”

Because I’m a man, when I catch a cold I need someone to bring me soup and take care of me while I lie in bed and moan. You never get as sick as I do, so for you, this isn’t an issue.

Because I’m a man, I can be relied upon to purchase basic groceries at the store, like milk or bread. I cannot be expected to find exotic items like “Cumin” or “Tofu.” For all, I know these are the same thing. And never, under any circumstances, expect me to pick up anything for which “feminine hygiene product” is a euphemism.

Because I’m a man, when one of our appliances stops working I will insist on taking it apart, despite evidence that this will just cost me twice as much once the repair person gets here and has to put it back together.

Because I’m a man, I don’t think we’re all that lost, and no, I don’t think we should stop and ask someone. Why would you listen to a complete stranger – I mean, how in the world could he know where we’re going?

Because I’m a man, there is no need to ask me what I’m thinking about. The answer is always either women or sports, though I have to make up something else when you ask, so don’t.

Because I’m a man, I do not want to visit your mother or have your mother come visit us, or talk to her when she calls, or think about her any more than I have to. Whatever you got her for mother’s day is okay, I don’t need to see it. And don’t forget to pick up something for my mommy, too!

Because I’m a man, you don’t have to ask me if I liked the movie… Chances are if you’re crying at the end of it ~
I didn’t.

Because I’m a man, I think what you’re wearing is fine. I thought what you were wearing five minutes ago was fine, too. Either pair of shoes is fine. With the belt or without it looks fine. Your hair is fine. You look fine. Can we just go now???

Because I’m a man and this is, after all, the year 2000, I will share equally in the housework. You just do the laundry, the cooking, the gardening, the cleaning, and the dishes. I’ll do the rest.

(This has been a Public Service Message for Women, to better understand the Male Animal.)

With you in understanding men,

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